I’ve been so busy these past months, in efforts to complete my counselling program, that I have had zero time for contemplation and creative writing. However, despite the fact that I am nearly finished with my program, I didn’t want to miss the opportunity to contemplate and celebrate Hemma’s 19th Birthday! Reflecting on this milestone I can’t believe we are nearing 20 years of service to the community.
I have experienced a number of transitions over the past couple of years. One of those has been the transition from full-time parent to parent on-call, or parent consultant. After more than 20 years of parenting – a role I have cherished more than any other – I find myself on the other end of my role and identity as parent and provider. Not that my role is gone completely, but the change is pretty dramatic. Suddenly questions of, “what am I going to do with my life?”, are creeping back in after nearly 30 years!
I can still remember life before parenting. Looking back, I was in the depths of existential questions about the meaning of my life, desperate to find purpose. When my first child was born these questions and angst vanished, almost instantly. The task at hand was right in front of me in the form of a beautiful radiant child. Having such purpose and clarity was a gift to my troubled young self. Now, nearly 30 years later, I can hardly believe that phase of my life is shifting.
With Hemma turning 19 this year I’ve been reflecting on how raising and running a business can, in some ways, be a lot like parenting children. I can still remember all the preparations as we prepared for the opening of Hemma – a year of visioning, drafting, creating, and building. On that first day I had the same sense of wonder and purpose I felt with my first child. Like an infant, the first few years of care were intense – long hours, worry, devotion, commitment. The business needed a lot of attention and care. When Hemma was 5 (the time when your child goes off to school) she was gaining some independence, learning from others, and being parented by more than just the parents. I could relax just a little bit, maybe even take a nap in the middle of the day!
Next came the teenage years. A time that is often unpredictable and filled with both awe and terror. A time of prayer! For us those years coincided with the pandemic. There was much chaos and unpredictability. Our purpose and intention however remained clear – to see this teen reach young adult-hood.
Teenagers either need a great deal of attention and support or they need freedom to explore on their own (I left home at 17). Hemma, now at 19, has gone off to form new relationships and no longer depends on me as they once did. Like my children, Hemma is now independent.
As a parent I feel so much gratitude for the life I have had with Hemma, and for all of the people who have played a role in getting her to this stage of life. I am now like most parents with grown children – awaiting the arrival of grand-kids. My wish is to see more community clinics being born throughout Canada!
The time I spend with my kids now is intentional and very meaningful. Some of the most important relationships of my life. I feel blessed to have an adult relationship with them, and to still have adventures with them, and get to watch them go on adventures of their own. Hemma is at a similar life stage, now having new relationships and running independently of me. Hemma would not have gotten to this stage without all of you. All the ways you have supported our vision and mission. A true community of health and wellness.
Now, working as a punk (community acupuncturist) two days a week in the clinic, I am happy to still have a relationship with Hemma – my other grown child! I continue to feel moved and inspired by all of you and the way we all come together to heal within community and support this mission. Have I said thank you for all your support, encouragement, and participation?
Thank you!